Homework for the Holidays

I have a love/hate relationship with December. End of the semester and no more student papers to grade, yay! Holiday festivities of all sorts, yay! The Nutcracker, yay! Socializing with friends and family, mostly. yay! Short, cold, days, meh! No ballet classes on offer around here for three weeks, boo!

What's a grownup bunhead to do?

Here I'm sharing with you the strategies that help get me through the ballet wasteland that is "Winter Break." This is unscientific, and just what has helped me, as a dancer living in a mature body, come back to class in the New Year full of energy and vim, rather than groaning and creaking. Well, there's always going to be some groaning and creaking.

1. Daily drills: even if you don't have space or the inclination to do an at-home barre, you can do some basic exercises daily, even while you are, for example, watching the holiday episodes of the Great British Baking show, or in some cases even while you do dishes from the Great Latke Blowout (our family tradition -- but you will probably find yourself with a sink full of dishes at some point). My daily list includes

• Calf raises and/or eleves in parallel (20x rest a bit, repeat 2x)
• Eleves in first position (ditto)
• Eleves in coupe (15x each side, rest a little, repeat 2x) NOTE: after this part of the series I spend some time stretching out my calves!!!
• Lunges with or without hand weights -- not great for doing in the kitchen, but certainly compatible with television. I do three sets of ten (that's both sides = 1 rep). If I'm feeling up to it, I do a port-de-bras from first to en haut with it.
• Side lunges (aka Sumo lunges), sometimes with a resistance band (15 each side times three)
• Clamshells with a band (15x each side, three sets)
• Mountain climbers (as many as I can do in 45 seconds, rest 14, repeat twice)
• Lie prone, resting forehead on ground. Raise opposite arm and leg, alternating, 15 reps 3 sets
• Lie supine, turned out. Do slow retire, developpe front, lower straight. 15 times each side, 3 sets.

I'm sure there are tons of other great exercises, but this little set keeps all the major muscle groups and joints moving and is surprisingly. effective at keeping your metabolism ticking along too; all the better for that extra slice of figgy pudding (I have no idea what figgy pudding is, btw).

2. Keep moving, keep stretching: during the winter of 2020, my spouse and I took long walks nearly. every day to combat the inertia of the lockdown (we live in a fairly low-density town, so risk of exposure to the virus out of doors was minimal). I was astounded at how effectively this kept me from getting the creaks, especially if when I came back inside to the warm coziness of my house, I took some time to stretch. So even if you can't get to ballet class, or the most you do is amble up and down the mall (this is a hypothetical mall, since the one mall in my. town was demolished about a year ago, and nobody cried any tears over it), once you're warm, take advantage of the situation, and do some stretching. Here's my standard routine post-winter-walk.

• Stretch up with hands over head, then fold from hips into a forward bend. Place hands on floor, ankles or shins, and slowly shift weight side to side, working the stretch up into the glutes.
• Step the right foot back into a high lunge. Unfold the upper body. You can support yourself with your hands on your thigh, or you can raise your arms overhead again, Hold this pose for a couple of breaths, until you feel your psoas softening up, and then you can drop into a low (runner's) lunge, hands on the floor. Again, hold the stretch for about 4-5 deep, relaxing breaths. 
• Now, shift through a "triangle" pose and (if it's comfortable for you), settle back on your folded right leg, extending your left in front of you with the foot flexed, toes pointing up. Fold forward over the leg if you need more stretch. Hold 4-5 breaths.
• Move through triangle pose back to your low lunge. Now, you can either let your left butt, thigh, and calf lie down flat on the floor in a turned out position aka "pigeon" or you can start to move into your splits.
• Repeat on the other side.
• After this sequence, I like to do a seated straddle stretch (my hip mobility is not such that I can do center splits unless I'm very, very warm, like hot yoga warm). I sit in a straddle, and then I go forward with a flat back. When you're doing this at first, it can be helpful to prop your butt up on some yoga blocks. I try to get my chest down to the floor, rather than my head. Then I walk my finger tips over to one side, then the other... this is an intense stretch for me. I always counter it with some butterfly sitting and a "cow's head" stretch (where you sit with your legs bent at the knee in front of you, one over the other).

NEVER STRETCH WHEN YOU ARE NOT WARMED UP

3. Take "online" class: it's definitely not the same as taking a class in a studio, but there are numerous options ranging from free, pre-recorded content to live zoom classes. Here are a few of my favorites:

Pre-recorded and free:

• My all-time favorite is this series from the Dutch Het Nationale Ballet (don't worry, it's in English)
• A close second is Kathryn Morgan's content. A big bonus is that she also has a ton of workouts and strength-building exercises, as well as some fun chatty content about life in the ballet world. As a former NYCB and Miami City Ballet principal and an expert teacher, Morgan is delightful to learn from. She also has more premium content behind a paywall, and you can take live online classes from her and her "friends" as well.
• The Royal Academy of Dance (RAD) has a wonderful series for mature dancers ("silver swans") that is really appropriate for anyone wanting to drill down on their technique.
• Also geared towards adult learners, Broche Ballet is emerging as one of the big voices in the adult ballet community, and Julie's classes are fun and easy to follow, with great explanations of technique. Although a lot of her content is behind a subscription paywall, and again, as with Morgan, she offers live classes online as well as recorded classes.

This is a really short list. I also have enjoyed free classes and "challenges" by Claudia Dean, who has the most entertaining Australian accent, and Ballerinas by Night is a fun channel run by Jana, whom I met one summer at ArtEmotion, and who is very adult-focused in her teaching.

Live online classes and pay-to-view prerecorded material:

Most big studios now offer zoom options, but here are just a few favorites of mine:

• Joffrey Now (Joffrey School, New York)
• Alvin Ailey Extension (all genres)
• Mark Morris
• American Ballet Theater (adult specific classes)

4.  Reach out to your teacher and see if there are opportunities to do a couple of private or semi-private lessons over the break. Getting some one-on-one coaching shouldn't be a luxury just for pre-professional students. Anyone, at any age or level, can benefit from some personal attention. One winter, I did a couple sessions with one of my teachers that really helped solve a problem I was having with petite allegro (it had to do with not closing my fifths). I'm thinking this winter may be the time to tackle my mental anguish over pirouettes en dehors to the left en pointe (I took a bad fall a few years ago and I find that it comes back to haunt me). So, if you decide to invest in this, make sure you target some things you would like to work on and communicate those to your teacher.

Happy dancing (or sort of dancing)! Enjoy the break from routine.

What is a ballet body?

Ballet is about bodies. Right from its origins, this was an art form concerned with the presentation of a specific, highly curated vision of the human form. The body of the aristocratic man was a subject of great fascination to aristocratic men (and probably also women, but we hear a lot less from them) of the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries. There is an enormous amount of scholarship on masculinity in this period, but you don't need to be an academic to recognize that Baroque-era Europeans were OBSESSED with the beauty and suavity of the aristocratic male body. In the famous Rigaud portrait of Louis XIV, the original premier danseur, of course we have the assiduous attention to the Sun King's gorgeous gams, clad in snowy stockings, exposed to the thigh, and framed by his ermine-lined doublet of blue silk brocaded with the fleur-de-lys in gold and his frilly trunk hose. He stands in a relaxed fourth position, the better to show off his white satin shoes, with their red heels, diamond buckles, and coral ribbon bows. There's another Rigaud portrait of Louis in the Prado in Madrid, less often cited in ballet histories, but identical in its fixation on Louis' sexy legs. Here, he's wearing armor, standing in essentially the same pose, looking essentially the same, a bit like the 63-year-old Mark Morris (Louis was 63 when both portraits were painted in 1701); now the legs are shiny steel and the shoes are black, but just as in the other portrait there's a lot of visual attention to the tops of his thighs and his pelvis -- here, it's achieved by an absolutely fabulous, theatrical sash worn low on his hips, fluttering between his thighs and puffing out over his ass.  

Mark Morris, photographed at the Mark Morris
 Dance Center in Brooklyn, NY, August 9, 2019
Photo by Chris Sorenson for the Wall Street Journal

Hyancithe Rigaud, Louis XIV of France,
1701. Prado, Madrid (photo: Prado)

Louis' panache, his cocked leg, his inscrutable gaze, the jut of his elbow, add up to his ineffable physical expression of power and assurance. He is not just a (very manly) man, but The Man. Rigaud imagines Louis very much as one supposes Louis imagined himself, the ideal instance of the divine right of kings, his body with its ease, its beauty, and its mastery of everything from dancing to horsemanship the arts of violence (war, hunting) an expression of God's favor. 

The sexuality of a figure like Louis, or of many of the male courtiers with whom he surrounded himself, is almost irrelevant here; to call these super-powerful, hyper-masculine aristocrats "queer" would be doing an injustice to the term, though certainly some (most? many?) of them had more fluid notions of what constituted "normal" sexual appetites than your average 21st century conservative. They were certainly fairly polyamorous -- while the Catholic Church would not marry you to more than one person, for a king to have a mistress (or two or three) as well as (on the q.t.) male lovers would surprise exactly nobody. It was an expression of a man's dominance and potency to be literally, sexually, dominant and potent in that way.

The sexiness, or just the sexuality of the ballet body is one of those things that people often feel uncomfortable discussing. In some parts of the popular imagination, the body of the dancer, or specifically, of the ballerina, is a kind of pink-washed blank spot on the map of human sexuality, a sugar-coated vision of innocence and prettiness. This is of course ridiculous and a product of the infantilization of women generally, and of ballet dancers specifically. One of the things I really struggle against as an adult dancer and now dance teacher is this idea that ballet is specifically for children, when nothing could be farther from the truth, from the 17th century up to now.

Ballet is intrinsically about the most fundamental human impulses and emotions: desire, loss, love, heartbreak, hope, despair, joy, hatred, grief, envy, cunning, delight, dreaming... And since ballet is an art form that speaks through and with the body, it falls upon the dancing body to express and represent these states. While there are some ballets that are literally all about sexual desire, lust, fulfillment, and kinks (Petite Mort being the prime example), most of the major story ballets trade in this coin at some level as well. Swan Lake, anyone? Romeo and Juliet? Manon? Even La Fille Mal Gardee (after all, what does she need to be "gardee"d from?). The simple fact that the pas de deux joins two human bodies together in a very intimate way means that you simply cannot scrub sex and sexuality from the picture.

Okay, so here is where things get kind of weird, and what I've been thinking about since the 2024 Olympics wrapped up. This was the first Olympics in which break dancing was a medal sport, which led to a lot of talk about whether ballet would ever be considered (I hope not), and in the run-up to the games, there was a public barre session led by the POB dancers that looked like fun, but that is not the connection that has me ruminating. Rather, it is the brouhaha over the women boxers Imane Khelif and Lin Yu-Ting, who were accused (by other competitors) of being "men," which then sparked a whole firestorm of commentary from anti-trans celebrity voices who jumped on the bandwagon of saying that these two women were men (they're not), and then people from the trans-positive community also claiming them as intersex or trans people (they are women -- it's a matter of public record). 

What does boxing have to do with ballet? At the most basic level, they're both about bodies, and about the relationships between bodies. They're about grace, and in their own ways, violence, and a kind of stylized movement. As this rather fluffy piece from GQ notes, Muhammad Ali, in old videos, moves with "the nimbleness of Nureyev." They require extreme physical fitness for those who engage with them at a competitive level, and they are both styled as art forms with connotations of nobility -- indeed, one epithet for boxing is "the noble art." This term came about in the 19th century, and it coincided with the British aristocracy's adoption of boxing as one of the legitimate forms of upper-class masculine sport, along with the longstanding martial arts of swordsmanship and marksmanship, and of course, things like etiquette and yes, dancing. More relevantly to this little thought piece, they both began as explicitly masculine pursuits, but were "invaded" early on by women of the lower social classes; by the 1720s, both female ballet dancers and female boxers were scandalizing these bastions of male, aristocratic expertise, and titillating audiences that included large numbers of those same male aristocrats. 

Hattie Madders, London, 1883

Marie-Anne de Camargo, flashing her ankles in about 1730

But there's a huge difference between these early women on the stage and in the ring: the dancers were highly sexualized, becoming sought-after partners for upper class men, whereas the boxers were generally thought of as unfeminine and frightening (indeed, Hattie Madders, shown above, bore the title, "Scariest Woman in England" for a time).

As ballet choreographers and companies grow more adventuresome about and comfortable with representing and exploring a plurality of genders and a range of sensualities and sexualities, I am hopeful that this classical art form will evolve, as the sport of boxing is evolving, and as other sports traditionally. gendered feminine or masculine (ice skating, gymnastics, rugby...) to be not only more inclusive, but also, more fertile as spaces for the imagination of what gender and sexuality can and might look like or feel like. I'm particularly hopeful about the work of choreographers like Christopher Rudd and Adriana Pierce, and companies like Ballez, or even Pacific Northwest Ballet, which numbers among its corps de ballet the gender fluid dancer Ashton Edwards, who performs both in traditionally male and female roles. 

But at the same time, I am terrified. I have a transgender child, and I have seen how unbelievably cruel and difficult the world can be towards people whose sexuality and gender identity don't match up with the binaries of western patriarchy. If ballet and sports can help by presenting the wider public with a humane view of the plurality of gender and sexuality that exists out there, fantastic. But by the same token, when the mass media phenomenon of something like the Olympics brings attention to the frailties and fracture points of the binary system, there are bound to be those who will exploit this exposure to whip up anxiety, fear, and hatred. These can and do have very real, very embodied consequences; violence against transgender and gender non-conforming people is escalating even as public acknowledgement of their existence rises -- one study by UCLA Law School found that transgender people are four times as likely to become victims of violent assault (sexual or otherwise) than gender-conforming people. And among these victims, the overwhelming majority are trans women of color. 

I think that institutions, like the Olympics, need to be extra cautious about how they manage the discussion around and representation of gender and sexuality. And they need to get out ahead of the ball so that athletes like Imane Khelif and Lin Yu-Ting are not exposed to the truly life-threatening hostilities that they are now dealing with as a result of the Games' failure to provide preventative measures around an issue that officials must have known would arise, given that both athletes had already been the target of persecution. There's also the whole way in which most Olympic sports are so adamantly gender-binary, purportedly for reasons of fairness; but what if athletes could elect to compete in non-binary events? Just a thought, and a thought inspired, at least in part, by the complex gender history of classical ballet, an art form about bodies, but also about their mutability (swan maidens, rose-spirits, and all that...)

Looking back over my first year of teaching teen-adult ballet

When I started teaching teen-adult beginning ballet last fall (after subbing and doing some occasional private group lessons for a year or two), I approached it very much the same way I approach my teaching work as a college professor. I started with an objective -- the "big thing" I wanted my students to learn,  and I worked back from there, breaking that big objective down into its component parts. I did a lot of reading around adult learners, and especially around teaching dance to adults, but I also brushed up on dance anatomy and terminology, cross training for dancers, and more general ways to build the mind-body connection in people who aren't used to moving that much, or whose movement patterns have been very repetitive for a long time.

The objective I set was for my students to experience the pleasure of ballet while training their bodies and minds to the movement vocabulary of the art form. In short, I aimed high for them.

Breaking this down into a bunch of more concrete and measurable outcomes, I began thinking about the elements of ballet, and I came up with this schematic:

Once I had gone through this exercise in mental organization, I started to look at that big review I had done of the literature on teaching ballet to adults (and I use the term "literature" quite broadly here to include my own experiences of being instructed, videos and blogs by those giving and receiving instruction, books about ballet instruction more generally, and conversations with people far more knowledgable than myself). I was very attracted to a syllabus for total beginner adult students developed by Liane Fisher of Fisher Ballet Productions. Ms. Fisher is a Cecchetti trained, multiply credentialed expert in ballet and dance instruction, so it's no surprise that she has a really well-informed practice, and also no surprise that many elements of her syllabus mapped well to the schema I had created based on my own knowledge of ballet and my reading. 

Because her syllabus is geared to total novices in a seven-week course, and I would be teaching a mix of novices, those with a year or two of experience, returners (those who used to dance and are coming back after a hiatus), and more advanced students just wanting to work on foundations, and because I had a full 15-week semester for three hours a week, I treated her syllabus as a point of departure, adding to it elements drawn from other syllabi and my own interest in floor work as an essential part of ballet training. One of the things I've noticed about adult learners (and this could be true of children as well -- I just haven't taught that many kids) is that often, they have a lot more physical capacity than they think they do, but they're pretty out of touch with their bodies, especially in relation to space; for this reason, spending some time lying down or sitting on the floor at the beginning of class (or even between barre exercises) can be very illuminating for them. 

So, basically, what I did was start by introducing three new "subjects" a week from the schema above. Thus, in the first week, I focused on alignment, positions of the feet, and articulation of the feet. What this translated to was lying on our backs on the floor experimenting with turnout, core engagement, isolating the part of the body that was moving from the trunk, pointing and flexing our feet, then standing up and facing the barre to essentially repeat all of these movements in a vertical orientation. I really stressed, especially for those with a little more dance experience, that what we were doing was "tuning our instruments" -- just as every violinist has to start every practice session by tuning the strings of the violin to the standard GDAE sequence, so the ballet dancer has to start each practice session by tuning the body to ballet alignment.

We didn't even really do tendus until the second week, but the crazy thing is that even with just three positions of the feet (1st, 2nd, 3rd), tendu en avant and à la seconde, plié , relevé, and a few positions of the body, I could actually get them off the barre, into center, and doing combinations that looked pretty darn good, considering some of them had never done even ten minutes of ballet a week earlier. We also had a lot of fun towards the ends of these classes, when we would do different ballet walks, which I used to introduce concepts of musicality and expression. 

And so it went, through the first semester (fall), gradually building up skills and confidence. I learned as much from my students as they learned from me, probably more. I gained an appreciation for all the different kinds of bodies and minds that people bring tot he studio, and I got better at planning lessons and remembering my choreography. With beginners, one real trap is doing every single combination with them so they have someone to follow. I am still working on how to wean people from that dependency! Fortunately or unfortunately for me in the regard, I'm currently nursing tendinitis in my right foot, so I can't really go all out. One or two of my students are really struggling without having me there to visually cue them, but most of the time it seems like if I get them started they can take it from there.

Second semester was a chance to go back to the drawing board a bit, since I had a lot of turnover -- of about twelve students only four returned (the others moved away or had injuries or family obligations), and the new crop of beginners included everyone from a woman my own age who had never done ballet, though she had been a pretty sharp ballroom dancer at one time, to some college students and one young teen. I probably did not spend quite as much time slowly building the foundations for this group, but that seemed to work okay.

My spring group was able to perform at the end of the year. Rather than do a "recital" piece where they showed off their movement vocabulary, I decided to really let them dance. I set the choreography to an instrumental version of "Eliza's Aria" from the contemporary ballet suite, Wild Swans, by the composer Elena Kats-Chernin, and incorporated a lot of the classical/romantic movements that denote "swan" in ballet. I was so proud of them in the end, because they just clearly had so much fun performing it, and also, it looked really cool, if I do say so myself. There was this one bit where I had them run in two spiral patterns in opposite directions (clockwise, counterclockwise) weaving through each other, and at first it was just awful chaos, but then, like magic, about a week before the performance, it clicked into place, and it was such a spectacular effect, like a flock of birds wheeling in a murmuration (I know, I know, swans do not do this, starlings do, but it's art, so there's room for artistic license and it never pays to be too literal). 

My amazing swans, photo by Sierra Nicole Lippert

Some of my students came back for the five-week summer session, and it has been fun to see them grow into the role of "experienced dancer" as new people join in. Some of them will be back in the fall, and I'm sure there will be a fresh draft as well. I just have so much fun seeing them develop confidence, artistry, skill, and above all, joy in motion. I hope that even those that don't continue with ballet will always have this little, pleasurable memory of our time learning together.

For the new school year, I've identified a few big things I want to accomplish as a teacher, so that my students can have the best possible experience.

1. I want to help them identify and achieve simple, skill-based goals that are realistic for them, and then do regular check ins to see how they feel they are progressing.

2. I want to give my fall students an end-of-term performance opportunity so that they don't fade away towards the end of the semester as family holiday obligations start to outweigh just going to class. I've noticed that adults seem to like to have a project they're working on, like learning a piece of choreography.

3. Once a month, throw in a class that focuses on conditioning and returning to our sense of turnout and alignment (e.g. floor barre, center barre, even conditioning ball work)

Mostly, I want to keep learning and improving as a teacher and finding ways to extend this "side hustle" of mine into a thoughtful, reflective, and life-affirming practice. We're in for a rough time ahead in the world, I think, and it's important to keep tending the gardens where we can step away from the furor.

Cracking on...

It's that time of year in ballet land when no matter whether you're in the big leagues or at the proverbial Dolly Dinkle School, there's a purple-pink shimmer, candy-cane scented, wafting through the air. Nutcracker Season is upon us!

If you haven't already read the excellent Nutcracker Nation by Jennifer Fisher, I urge you to find a copy right now! It's such a great, and loving, exploration of the whole Nutcracker phenomenon, especially in North America, and especially in relation to our multicultural landscape. Essentially, Fisher demonstrates that the popularity of The Nutcracker Ballet in North America has a very distinct cultural and economic history rooted in the rise of television and the development of suburban leisure values in post-WWII US and Canadian culture. And as anyone doing the books for a ballet-based school or company in North America knows, it's the moneymaker and the parent-pleaser that you almost cannot do without.

But there is not just one Nutcracker, there are instead Nutcrackers, one of the things Fisher explores towards the end of her book. The variability, the mutability, and the adaptability of this phenomenon to all sorts of audiences and communities is really fundamental to its lasting appeal. This is so perfectly illustrated in the documentary Dance Dreams: Hot Chocolate Nutcracker, which chronicles the 2019 production of Debbie Allen's studio's amped up, multi-genre tribute to the classic. It's a great film (Shondaland, natch!), but it also really explores how this weird German Romantic story filtered through French and Russian lenses and then commercialized in the twentieth century can be transformed to mean something to a group of Black and Brown kids from some pretty impoverished backgrounds who have been offered the opportunity, by Allen and her amazing team, to become artists. I got a little misty.

I've seen a lot of Nutcrackers in my day; it was an annual ritual when I was a kid in Seattle, and sometimes we'd even go to two in one season -- the PNB production and a visiting company. Then I saw it in Boston at one point, and I'm pretty sure I saw the SF Ballet production a couple of times. Unlike other ballets where I'm always tempted to say, "Oh, this version is the best," I don't feel that way at all about the Nutcracker. It's really the case that each version has its own logic, its own raison d'etre.

Well, MOST versions. I feel a lot less openhearted about some of the film versions. As a young mom, I was subjected to frequent replays of the Barbie version. It's... odd and awkward, sort of like the doll herself. And then, I was not a huge fan of The Nutcracker and the Four Realms, which was weird in a way that seemed appropriate to the source material, but also weirdly boring (too much CGI?). I'm not counting filmed versions of stage productions, or even the Baryshnikov/Kirkland film from 1977. Those are not film versions of the story, just filmed ballets, if you know what I mean?

Although I was a baby bunhead, and took ballet pretty seriously from age 9 to 16, I actually was never in a Nutcracker production as a kid. My friends who went to PNB would get to be party children, or mice, or soldiers, but I never even went to an audition. I think my parents felt like it would be a hassle, and they were not wrong. One year, a girl in my class at Cornish was chosen as one of the Claras, and we were all so insanely jealous, until she told us that it was basically a lot of sitting around -- in the PNB production at the time, Clara and the Nutcracker Prince spent the entirety of Act II sitting on a throne. Still, I would have loved to be a mouse or a soldier... Instead, I got to be a villager, or once the old woman, in our school's production of the Snow Princess. Thanks, Nellie Cornish.

My eldest child loved ballet for a while (and still talks about wanting to go back to it, but that's another essay altogether), and really, really wanted to be in the civic ballet's production. Sadly, the only part they ever got was "Sleigh Page" -- basically, stagehand in an angel costume pushing the sleigh with Clara and the Nutcracker Prince on and off stage. Not exactly anyone's idea of a star turn. However, since my kid was in the show, I did makeup and helped out backstage, which was fun, but madness, given a cast of mostly kids under the age of 15.

In fact, being a mouse is still an ambition of mine. I would really love to play the Mouse King! First of all, there's the anonymity of wearing a giant mouse head, and second, it's such a campy, feisty part. I hope that someday my turn will come. I've been practicing my whisker cleaning and my lying-on-my-back-and-dramatically-dying moves.

Just once, I have been on stage for a Nutcracker, as a party parent (specifically, as "Party Mom #1"), and it was soooooo fun. I've also enjoyed being backstage and helping the kids with their costumes and makeup. It's just a treat to be part of the ritual, I suppose. And who doesn't love the Snow Scene, watched from the wings, while the local children's choir "Ah ah ah ah ahhhhs" from the balcony?

Anyhow, whatever your Nutcracker plans for this winter, may they prosper (and be free of weird, gross, culturally inappropriate stereotypes).

Gentle and Soft (and fun)

But are they having fun?

A very young friend asked me the other day for advice on his first Nutcracker audition (and his first dance audition) ever. I am not an expert on this topic by any stretch of the imagination, since I've never auditioned as an adult and I don't play any role in our civic company's auditions. I do have some experience, having done my share of auditions as a young dancer and having consistently had, well, disappointing outcomes. But, in the intervening years I have learned a thing or two about how to deal with situations which are definitely NOT judgement-free-zones; job interviews, teaching college freshman a required class, giving a plenary lecture... and if there is one single thing that stands out it is that if you just decide to focus on what's fun or at least mildly pleasurable about what you're doing, it tends to go better. Let the thing happen, but be gentle with yourself and go soft on the self critique.

In that spirit (the spirit of fun, which by the by is the inspiration for the title of this post, the mockumentary Gentle and Soft: The Story of the Blue Jean Committee, which is pure brilliance IMHO), I am encouraging my gentle readers to think about what's fun in their dancing lives, and to shed some of the self-seriousness that tends to accompany the study and practice of a classical art form. To that end, here's my "top five" fun things about adult ballet (as a learner and more recently also as a teacher).

1. People -- I meet so many interesting, life-enriching people through my classes, summer "adult ballet camp," and workshops. Some of my most valuable friendships have been formed through these experiences, and I always get such a kick out of discovering that the person who has been struggling through some crazy petit allegro combo with me is, in her spare time, an ICU nurse, an attorney, a radiologist, a professional chef, or the comptroller general of a big federal agency. Weird, huh? As an academic, even though I'm in university administration these days, most of the people I meet at work come from backgrounds similar to my own, e.g. they went to college, then to grad school for a PhD, and so forth. Ballet connects me to a whole different population, and it has really broadened my worldview in ways that go far beyond the art form itself.

Slightly punchy after a long day at artEmotion

2. Music -- I come from a really music-oriented family, but to be honest, music had started to play less and less of a role in my life as I concentrated on my academic career and raising a young family. And then, about fifteen years ago, I jumped back into ballet. I was disappointed, at first, that the classes I was taking were not taught with a live accompanist. In my youth, I had never taken a class without a pianist in the room (my ballet school, after all, was part of an arts college). And there is still nothing like a live accompanist. However, even with CDs and now streaming music, ballet class gives me a daily chance to reconnect to my music brain, and sometimes (about once a week) I do get to dance with an actual live accompanist. Whether it's the ubiquitous pop-hits reimagined as ballet class music (the strange afterlife of Gotye's "Somebody that I used to know"), or arrangements of Chopin or Bach, it's good just to feel the music in my fibers, and channel it through movement. With my adult beginner students, one thing I keep bringing their attention back to is the importance of the element of musicality in their dancing. You don't have to be a fantastic principal ballerina to express yourself through dance. In fact, expression of ideas, thoughts, and feelings is the whole purpose of dance, and music is a huge part of that. Furthermore, doing ballet leads me to listen to music (all sorts) more carefully as some quiet background awareness in my mind imagines what could be danced to it.

Here's Kathryn Morgan making the most of the whole Star Wars as ballet music phenom (in honor of May 4th, as in May the 4th be with you)

3. Sweat -- I've always felt there are two kinds of workouts. The ones that hurt so good and the ones that just hurt. Ballet class, for me, usually falls into the "hurt so good" category. Even if I've totally muffed it, the dizzy, zippy, panting and sweating aftermath of a really intense allegro combination, or the trembling legs of a post-adagio moment are as close to ecstatic as I feel most days. When I used to run, I would sometimes get to that higher plane after a really long "on" run, but I had a lot more "off" than "on" runs, and my knees just ached constantly. Ballet much more consistently delivers that exercise (I suppose endorphin-induced) high for me, and partly it's because while I'm pushing my body physically, I'm more aware of the mental challenge of remembering choreography and moving expressively with the music (see #2)

4. Creativity -- Here's the thing about dance. Even if you're not the one setting the choreography, each time you execute it, you recreate it, you make it new. I love the idea that even if I'm just doing tendus at the barre, I have the opportunity to interpret, and then reinterpret the sequence, and to put something into it that makes it my own. This might not be visible, outwardly, especially if the enchainement is particularly technical in its focus, but it's more a mental operation realized through the attentive connection of mind and body. Or really, more like, the body itself thinking. Anyway, it's the pleasure one takes in making something (a great sandwich, a successful party, a song, a machine that works, etc.) and then refining it, making it better, making it satisfying. I want to convey this facet of ballet to my students, and not just teach them "this is the right way to do X, the wrong way to do Y..."

Swan Boys being unique (from Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake)Credit...Caitlin Teal Price for The New York Times

5. Non-attachment -- What's fun about the spiritual state of non-attachment, one might ask? Well, it's more a case of the self getting out of the way of fun. That is to say, when I told my young friend to just have fun at his audition, what I think I was really saying was, don't let your anxiety or your awareness of other people looking at you, or any of that crap, become an obstacle to your authentic experience in the moment of the dance. If you're really present in the moment, then it's difficult to be all twisted up in the usual crap that makes us miserable. To really dance, one has to be present, and not attached to the many things that pull at us if we allow them to do so. Or perhaps, as Martha Graham said, “All that is important is this one moment in movement. Make the moment important, vital, and worth living. Do not let it slip away unnoticed and unused.” Just. Be. There.

Yup, that's MG

So, here's my message for today for all you adult ballet dancers: it's FUN!

Demi Goddesses (and two Demi Gods)

 

iconic sylphyness

Dazzling feats of pointe work are, without a doubt, one of the aesthetic pleasures of watching ballet. Charles-Louis Didelot, the early-nineteenth-century French dance master of the Russian Imperial Theaters in Saint Petersburg knew how to wow an audience – in 1815, he deployed his new “flying machine” (a kind of wire and pulley trapeze system) to hoist ballerina Geneviève-Adélaïde Gosselin up on her tippity toes in a performance of his ballet, Flore et Zephyr. Now, Mlle. Gosselin had already been experimenting with reinforcing the toes of her ballet slippers to rise past demi-pointe, so while Didelot (a man) commonly gets the credit for “inventing” pointe work, in all likelihood it was actually amongst the ranks of female dancers competing for the newfound celebrity afforded ballerinas who pushed ballet in the direction of dancing en pointe. At first it must have been just a breathtaking stunt, but in 1832, when Filippo Taglioni choreographed the ballet La Sylphide for his daughter, Marie, it became part of the visual repertoire of ballet denoting the Romantic-era ballerina’s light, sylph-like essence.

Much ink has been spilled about pointe work and the history of the pointe shoe; a Google Scholar search of the term “ballet” and the term “pointe” together yields over 30,000 results. Many of these are from physical therapy and medical journals, which perhaps suggests something, but there are also a healthy (if you want to call it that) number of scholarly works dedicated to the “phallic symbolism” and other metaphorical and semiotic implications of ballet’s longstanding gender divide around the pointe shoe. It’s all very interesting, all the more so in 2023, when the idea that a man might dance en pointe and do it seriously (as opposed to satirically) has taken root. I mean, why not ? (Well, because they’re not trained to it, and this could be dangerous for them, but on the other hand, if we did train boys on pointe, then it would probably be safer.)

As my title for this entry suggest, however, I’m not really wanting to think about pointe shoes. It’s bad enough that at fifty plus years old I still put them on my poor feet several times a week. So let’s talk instead about dancing without pointe shoes.

I’m teaching adult beginner ballet this fall with a bunch of women and two guys, and I’m really taking them down to the brass tacks, using a curriculum I adapted from a couple of different sources I found online that are specifically concerned with the training of adults starting ballet. One theme for the class is feet – how to articulate them, shape them, use them to maximum effect, and keep them healthy. The killer exercise we did in week one, and will come back to throughout the semester, is one I remember from my RAD days – slowly rising to quarter, half, and three-quarter pointe and then equally slowly lowering back down. It’s a brute, and also a bit boring, but adults are fully capable of recognizing what it’s doing in their bodies. The calves begin to burn, the arches feel it, and if you’re not holding your core, you wobble all over the place. 

I have a persistent joint problem in the big-toe metatarsal of my left foot, and sometimes it really squawks at me as I lower from three-quarter to half pointe, which in this context serves to remind me that this is not a particularly comfortable or habitual way in which most people move their bodies. We wear firm-soled shoes that cradle and cushion our feet, reducing the amount of finer adjustments and movements that they make all day long, so the muscles get atrophied. Twenty-first century footwear is the equivalent of the office chair – it is ruining our bodies’ range of motion and balance of strength!

The other footwork we’ve been doing is moving (all of this in first position, btw) from standing on two feet to one foot, with the working leg going to sur le cou de pied. While a big point of this exercise is feeling the turnout turn on (you literally cannot do slcdp without fully engaging the turnout muscles in the underbutt and pelvis), it’s also amazing how well it embeds the proprioceptive identity of the properly shaped foot. Since you cannot sickle when in this position, and since the structure of the standing leg gives tactile feedback to the sole of the working foot, it “trains” the mind-body connection to go “oh, that’s how my foot is supposed to be shaped"). I also pointed out to them last night that if you turn sideways to the mirror with your working foot towards the mirror, you can see that despite the fact it feels, at first, as if you’re really winging your foot back in this position (that is, contracting the muscles on the outer side of the ankle disproportionately while extending those on the inside), the inner anklebone and the big toe are almost perfectly aligned with the shin and the knee. That’s why it makes such a pretty line – a gentle, relatively flat curve, no kinks.

If you take that “wrapped” foot away from the supporting let and rest the tip of the longest toe on the floor, then flex the toes, the foot is positioned exactly how it ought to be for optimal placement in demi-pointe. Or, if you just stretch the knee to the extended position to the second, without changing anything else, you have a perfectly placed tendu. It was fun to watch them experiment with this, and then have the lightbulb visibly go on in their bodies and minds. After we did that, I really noticed that all of them, even those with very limited ankle movement, were pointing their feet, and not sickling!

Yay for demi-pointe and the old soft-shoe!

The Summer Doldrums

The dread summer doldrums of adult ballet have arrived. Summer intensives are over (more on that, shortly); summer session at our local ballet school has ended; next week the kids get a local intensive, but there's nothing for adults. What's a grownup bunhead to do?

Basement ballet, December, 2020

Thanks to the pandemic (did we ever imagine that would be a thing we could say, even sardonically, which, if you can't tell, is how it is intended here?), there are now a wealth of online options, from expensive live one-on-one coaching sessions to free videos where you can plié to your heart's content along with dancers from the Paris Opera Ballet led by Andre Klemm on the Pont des Arts in Paris. So, there’s the whole phenomenon of rec room or basement or kitchen counter barre. Which is… okay, I guess.

Earlier this summer, in the short spell between spring and summer sessions, I solved the problem for my peers (but not really for myself), by volunteering to lead some informal classes twice a week. It was fun, but kind of exhausting, despite that I did not really get to dance all that much myself. Probably, it was good practice for this fall, when I’ll be teaching adult beginners regularly for the first time. I’m excited, and not a little nervous, to take this on. My only “training” as a ballet teacher is the thousands of hours I’ve spent in class as a student, a very small amount of substitute teaching, some reading, and of course my background as a very different kind of teacher (e.g. college professor). I like that teaching makes me think about the movement more analytically, and it really challenges my brain to come up with intentional kinds of barre work that prepares people for specific exercises in center. Suffice to say, I have a lot to learn, and a lot of imposter syndrome (although, is it a “syndrome” when you really are, for all intents and purpose, an imposter) to get over.

I am taking inspiration from Julie Gill, however; she is sort of a guru of adult ballet, a real advocate for having an adult-specific approach that helps dancers progress through skills in a similar fashion to the way kids are taught, but with age-appropriate adaptations and acknowledgement of the reality of adult lives (e.g., we don’t operate on a “semester” cycle unless, that is, we are teachers or academics ourselves). I like her essay/podcast “Adult ballet training, philosophy, & inspiration” which is part of her “Facets of Ballet Series” which anyone who enjoys the brainy side of ballet (that is, the thinking about how it all works rather than just going with the flow of it, which is also cool) will find a rewarding listen.

Everybody loves floor barre!

I am also taking a page out of the book of a teacher I took class with at Joy of Motion in Washington DC about a million years ago (okay, ten). She was a former Graham dancer, but she was teaching ballet. I should add that she was over eighty years old. The first thing she had us all do (and this was an advanced/intermediate class) was lie down on our backs on the floor and “find” our bodies, moving through pliés and tendus front and side, so we could “house” our center in our pelvis (her words). It really is remarkable how something like that gives one a kind of physical sensation that can serve as a reference point later, when you’re standing at the barre or in center. If, that is, you remember to think about it. So I’m going to incorporate some floorwork into every class.

Finally, I’m of course inspired by all the wonderful teachers that I’ve been so fortunate to take classes from over the years. Aside from the stalwart ballet heroes at Cache Valley School of Ballet (Karyn! Vivian! Jaimie! Pam!) I’ve had some really transformative encounters elsewhere. 

Aaron Jackson at Washington Ballet made a huge impression on me – he was not afraid to push mature adult students to attain the kind of rigor that is ordinarily only expected of pre-professional students. “No, that’s not right. Try again,” was his motto, it seemed, and it worked – I made progress in my technique there, particularly in petite allegro, that I had not imagined possible. His classes were fun, too, the choreography hard enough to make my brain work, but not so hard as to completely defeat the mind-body connection. 

Another teacher I constantly return to when I can is Kat Wildish in New York City. She is a huge advocate of giving adult dancers the chance to develop and train seriously, and she also creates performance opportunities that sound amazing. As a drop-in student, I’ve never had the chance to do the shows, but I’ve learned a couple really useful things, including my favorite barre stretch, which is totally crazy, and so satisfying (it cannot be described, only demonstrated). 

In Seattle, I always try to drop in for a class with Annie deVuono at ExitSpace Dance. She brings this fun, slightly salty energy to class, and her choreography really compels one to focus on dance quality. The enchainements are interesting, but not weird, so you can really double down on the expressive elements. She makes great use of a somewhat limited space, and her classes are small, so you get a ton of personal attention. She has a way of giving corrections that make you feel like a “real” ballerina.

Honestly, it’s very seldom that I take an adult class that totally leaves me frustrated and sad; occasionally, when I’ve taken at big company studios, where there are thirty or forty people in an open class and the pre-professionals and company dancers get all the attention, I feel sort of marginal and uninspired, but that’s kind of to be expected, I think, as a class cannot be all things to all people.

With the incomparable Allison
(and baby Tilton #2)

Which brings me back around to summer intensives. This year, once again, I went to SLC for ArtEmotion, Allison DeBona and Rex Tilton's super awesome summer intensive for real grownups, and once again, it was transformational. I’m not saying I made huge advances in my ballet technique; I’m getting kind of old for that. Rather, I felt like I learned a lot about my body, about dance, and about how to work with what I’ve got. One highlight was the amazing series of pointe classes with Liz Wheldon, who is literally the kindest ballet teacher I’ve ever had, who just infuses the room with love and light and makes you think you’re nailing it even if you are a fifty-something-year-old woman clonking around in pointe shoes. 

It was also a huge privilege to be in the group that Rex Tilton set choreography on – we were definitely a challenging bunch, and the piece was way more lovely and sophisticated than you would think that a bunch of adult intermediate-to-advanced types could pull off, but it came together and, I’m told, looked pretty amazing (the videos haven’t been sent to us yet, so I’ll have to wait for confirmation on that). For me, the choreographic piece is always the greatest challenge both mentally and physically. It’s just outside the norm of what I do with dance, most of the time. 

Finally, I have to mention the last ballet class of the whole week, which we took with Ron Tilton. He had this little tip for turning that has literally changed everything for me. It has to do with using your off-side arm to whip across your body, farther than you think you need to, in order to actually just get your shoulders square. Again, it’s easier to demonstrate than to describe, but it seriously makes the rotations just come so much more smoothly. 

So, as I drift in the dance doldrums, I am directing my thoughts towards three goals for the coming year:

• Dance mindfully, applying the things I’ve learned and hopefully growing them.
• Teach holistically, taking into account the realness of adult ballet
• Embrace risk in both teaching and dancing – try new things, get down on the floor and up in the air, and learn some really challenging choreography

Alright, cue up that basement ballet video, I’m ready to start!