My two months in Pasadena are over, and I have been far too busy dancing (and oh, incidentally, working) to keep up here. This period of being on vacation from real life has allowed me to take class almost every day with a variety of teachers, to get to know some other adult ballet students like myself, and to explore the dimensions of my obsession.
As discussed earlier, I was mostly taking classes at two studios which I characterized as on the one hand more technically-oriented and on the other more "noodle" -- that is to say expressive, free form, dance-y. But that is really a false dichotomy. The "noodle" studio did have a more choreographic focus, and I sometimes found that my level was not quite up to the choreography -- I just couldn't do THOSE steps THAT fast. Occasionally the instructor would demonstrate this beautiful, breathless petit allegro and I'd think "Yeah, I'm going to hit that!" only to find that I simply couldn't keep all the steps in my head and convey them to my body. This has always been a challenge for me -- some people just learn the combination the first time through but I am somehow dyslexic this way... I transpose things, get the wrong port-de-bras with the right step or vice versa. Partly it is a matter of practice and the degree to which the movements are embedded in body-brain network; professional dancers and serious dance students have millions of repetitions of the movements to call upon. But partly, it's just that I am a bit too much in my head. Probably that is why this late rediscovery of ballet has been so good for me, psychologically. It forces me to be in the moment, in my body, in the music, and NOT in that cluttered country of my thoughts.
As for the more "technical" studio, which I ended up liking better, partly because it was easier to get to and partly because I felt a little more at ease there, there was plenty of real dancing there too. One of the teachers is a choreographer whose work is very classical, or maybe neo-classical is a better word, since from what I've seen of his work on videos, he incorporates some of what I would call "classical modern" and "classical jazz" movement into his classical ballet. But still, pointe shoes, male/female partnering... the basics. His combinations were often just as complex as those in the noodle studio, but somehow I was able to get them a little better. Maybe he taught them more gradually? Anyway, they were very dance-able and sometimes I'd catch myself in the mirror grinning like a big, happy, idiot.
I did take one Vaganova class too at another studio. It was a pretty basic level, but it still utterly killed me; I think in fact that I injured myself there, even though in fact the instructor was working with me on form. I have a weak left hamstring, and sometimes I just push it too hard, especially if I'm really working on turnout from the hip (and it was a Vaganova class, so...). So, Aleve and Arnica and some rest are in order.
For me the best part of this whole experience has been the chance to go every day and therefore to build on my learning in a more continuous and cumulative way. Yesterday's corrections are easier to remember than last week's, and the things that you bring from day to day get etched into your body so that they don't have to be consciously remembered any longer. Flexibility benefits from the daily iteration of all of the active stretches that are just part of the barre work -- I see a big difference in my turnout and my feet, in particular. And while I do not particularly invest a great deal in the elevation of my extensions (I am, after all, forty-three), I see those coming along as well, though I'd still really like to improve my back flexibility so that my arabesques don't look so blocky and stiff.
I will not be able to take so many classes back home, but I have decided that I am going to supplement my dancing with some gym training to work on core strength, my hamstrings, my weak right foot/ankle, and back strength and flexibility, and I'll be back to yoga classes. Next term I might also take a modern class from one of my colleagues in the Theater department. I could stand to work on the kind of centered, contract/expand movement that invovles.
